Writing a novel: Putting thoughts to page.

Every so often before I fall asleep I get a thought in my head that just won't die. My brain goes into overdrive and I end up thinking of every possible conclusion until I fall asleep. 

Last night was one of those nights. I got it in my head that I needed a plan of what I would do if Nessa passed away unexpectedly. Yes I know it's a morbid thought but I ended up mapping out multiple scenarios of what would happen. So this morning when I wake up the thought was still in my head and I decided I wanted to take the thought and turn it into something picture. Since I have no intention of killing my wife since I love her I figure the next best thing would be to turn it into a novel. I passed the thought past Nessa who told me to go for it even though it's a weird and morbid idea. She even helped me plan a few things for the concept. 

So as she was traveling to school I came up with the basic chapter outline and wrote the opening. I then proceeded email the opening to Nessa to which she replied that she most likely would not be reading any more of what I write. 

I can't say I really blame her.

Anyways I've decided to share the opening on here. I won't be posting any more of what I write but I feel like sharing this. I'm not even sure what it will end up as. I know I will write the whole thing and I know it will take a lot of time and effort. It may end up being a long short story or a short novel. Either way wish me luck and I hope you enjoy the opening!

Chapter One

Life is made up of little moments. Often we take these moments for granted and we don’t take the time to enjoy them the way we should. We miss the chance to take a picture or we fail to appreciate every breath. We assume that we will get another chance but at some point we will run out of chances.

I can’t remember our last morning together. I’m sure we ate breakfast because we always ate breakfast. I’m sure I took Boogs for a walk because that was also routine. I know it was a Wednesday because I was planning on watching Survivor when I got home. The rest is just gone. No matter how hard I try I just can’t remember if I kissed my wife goodbye.

I remember reading on Twitter how there was a major accident on the highway and that 6 people were dead. It never occurred to me that (name) would be one of the deaths. We talked about the accident at work in between helping annoying customers worried about receiving double texts when they have unlimited messaging. A few hours later I was taken to the hospital where a doctor tried to explain that (name) was in a coma and the chances of her waking up were slim. Apparently she was on life support and the chances of her recovering were not likely. He kept talking but looking at her hooked up to so many machines made it easy to tune him out. At that point I knew she had five days to wake up or I would have to make the decision to unplug the machines.

I had not been able to see Boogs. They told me that he had passed away quickly and that it was nothing that could be done for him. I was too shunned to cry but as family and friends came tears flowed. The doctor explained the situation many times over the first few days because I didn’t care about what he had to say. I didn’t need it explained to me.

I had promised that she would be on life support for five days at the most. It was a promise I made never thinking I would need to actually make the decision but I knew I had to keep it. I loved her that much that I couldn’t break this promise. I sat by her bed the entire time. I slept in the most uncomfortable care but that was ok because I barely slept. I didn’t want to miss another breath or the chance that a miracle would happen and she would open her eyes. 

She never did and after exactly five days I had them turn off the machines.

Can someone still get away with murder?

On February 26th Trayvon Martin was shot by Community Watch Leader George Zimmerman. This happened in Florida in a community I've never heard of but for some reason the story haunts me. 

I listened to some of the 911 tapes of the incident and couldn't finish them. What I heard was tragic. It was even more tragic when considering that Zimmerman stands a good chance of not being arrested for the death of a 17 year old boy. A boy who was not armed. In fact all he was carrying was a bag of skittles and a can of iced tea. 

The first 911 tape shows Zimmerman advising police that he saw a suspicious black man in a hoodie. I know that hoodies may seem suspicious but the fact that it was raining should have relieved some of the suspicion. The 911 respondant clearly advises Zimmerman not to follow the "suspect" and police where on there way to the community. Within 20 minutes of that call Trayvon was dead and Zimmerman was claiming self defense and potential getting away with murder.Other tapes you can hear someone calling for help in the background and then a gun shot. The screams for help end once the shot is heard.

The obvious conclusion is that it is based on race. The tapes show Zimmerman's anger towards black males getting away with crimes. It seems like he simply decided to take justice into his own hands. I can't make the jump that it was an act of a racist. I am not convinced his actions were based on racism but I am also not convinced self defense holds up.

Witnesses say they heard to two fighting. A 13 year old boy walking his dog saw an altercation but his dog got away and he ran after him when he heard the gunshot. Witnesses say they heard the boy cry for help while Zimmerman claims he was the one crying for help and no one would come. 

Zimmerman did have wounds. He had blood on the back of his head. Maybe there was an altercation. Maybe Trayvon fought back against someone he thought was threatening him. I do not have the facts and there are only two people that know exactly what happens and sadly one of them is dead. Now only Zimmerman knows how the altercation started.

What bothers me is that it is such a pointless death. It never should have happened. Zimmerman should have never gotten out of his truck. He should not have been carrying a gun. He should not have confronted Trayvon. He should have waited until the police arrived and let them handle it. 

Zimmerman made the wrong choices that night and for those choices a 17 year old boy who was unarmed is dead. A boy who was visiting friends and just wanted to go get a snack at 7pm at night. 

It may have felt like self defense to Zimmerman but he didn't need to pull the trigger. Simply pulling out the gun most likely would have calmed the boy.The fact that Zimmerman approached Trayvon is where this starts. Trayvon may have been acting in self defense if he felt Zimmerman was dangerous. That should be enough for an arrest. Let the case go to trial. Let all the facts be known. Let Zimmerman sit on the stand and have him tell his story. Let a judge and jury decide if it is murder or simply a case of a man defending himself.

This won't change anything. I just needed to write my feelings on this senseless death that didn't need to happen. Trayvon Martin deserves his story to be heard. He deserves some sort of justice because if Zimmerman simply walks then Trayvon is made to look like a criminal who deserved to be killed. That just does not sit well with me.

Music Monday: Songs that are stuck in my head now

Last week I posted some songs that have stuck with me over the years and this week I'm gonna post some songs that are stuck in my head now but chances are they will be replaced on a play list by the end of summer. They are fun songs to listen to and I show no guilt in listening to them. 

 These are songs that I can't help singing to when they come on TV or my play list. And while they may not be songs that last forever if they started playing in a few years I probably wouldn't skip them. They have potential to join Ace of Base on my list of songs I don't always listen to but wouldn't skip if they played. I'd probably even be happy to listen to them.

Kris Allen - The Vision of Love

I don't wanna run, I don't wanna hide
When someone needs somebody
I don't wanna say, I don't got the time
When someone needs somebody
With a little faith and a little soul
We can't go wrong

Kelly Clarkson - Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)

 You think you got the best of me
Think you've had the last laugh
Bet you think that everything good is gone
Think you left me broken down
Think that I'd come running back
Baby you don't know me, cause you're dead wrong

Carly Rae Jepsen - Call Me Maybe

Hey, I just met you and this is crazy
But here’s my number, so call me maybe
It’s hard to look right at you baby
But here’s my number, so call me maybe
Hey I just met you and this is crazy
But here’s my number, so call me maybe
And all the other boys try to chase me
But here’s my number, so call me maybe 

Initial Impression: Pilot Season

It's casting season for many new pilots that are in development for next fall. While it is still really early and everyday new actors are announced for pilots I thought I'd post my first impression on five shows that are in development that intrigue me the most. Of course there is a chance that none of these will be picked up but I can't help myself from getting excited about the potential of these series. 

There were other developing shows that also interested me but they were either still casting the show or the show was on Fox. I have finally decided not try a new Fox show next year. If the show gets a season two and looks interesting I'll jump on board then but not a moment before a second season announcement. I've been burned by Fox too many times. I also only went with broadcast pilots because I always wait before jumping on a Cable show band wagon.

With that diatribe done here are five shows that excite me based on show concept and casting.

Arrow (CW)

"Based on the DC Comics title, published by DC Entertainment, this hourlong drama is a modern retelling of the legendary DC Comics character Green Arrow."

Since Smallville ended I expected the CW to jump back into the super hero/comic world with a new show. While I thought it would be some sort of spin off I am OK with the direction that they have decided to take with Arrow. While I think Smallville did a good job with the character I like the idea of stepping away from the show and trying to blaze their own trail for the character.

I still see the show following mostly the same path as far as story except it'll be tailored towards their characters. I still expect the show to have the action and relationships that made Smallville great. While I started Smallville for the story of Clark Kent becoming Superman I stayed to see how he would be friends with Lex. I am hoping Arrow can pull off that type of dynamic.

I am also excited for the cast of the show. Stephen Amell has been good in most roles he has played and Katie Cassidy has hit every role she has had out of the park. She was the only reason to watch that horrible remake of Melrose Place and even added some excitement to the sinking ship called Gossip Girl last season. Also Willa Holland has the potential to be a scene stealer if used right. 

For a great place to follow news and insight into the show you should check out Green Arrow TV. It is run from the same fine fellow who did Krytonsite for Smallville which I still frequent and he has a large network of websites for other shows.

Green Arrow TV

Joey Dakota (CW)

"Based on the Israeli format Danny Hollywood.  In this romantic-time-travel-musical, a documentary filmmaker travels back in time to the 1990’s where she meets and falls in love with the rock star subject of her film. When she unexpectedly returns to present day, she must find her way back to the past to reunite with her love and prevent his untimely death."

The concept of the show is about a reporter who travels back in time to research a Rock Star who died young. While there she falls in love with the Rock Star and is bought back to the future. Once back she struggles to get back to the 90's to safe him. 

Sure it sounds like a bad romantic comedy but the premise reminds me of Being Erica. I initially had no interest in watching that show but once I tried it on Netflix I flew through the serious quickly and finished the series while it ran on TV. One of my favorite storylines on the show was the relationship between Erica and Kai. He was a Rock Star who came back to change his past. I figure the series will hopefully take the emotion of that story arc and blow it out to a full blown series.

And for those who don't know Being Erica this scene tied up the first part of their storyline.   

As for cast I loved both Legend of the Seeker and Greek so the casting of Craig Horner and Amber Stevens is OK in my book.

 
666 Park Avenue (ABC)

"When a young couple accepts an offer to manage one of the most historic apartment buildings in New York City, they unwittingly begin to experience supernatural occurrences, which complicate and endanger the lives of everyone in the building. Based on the book by Gabriella Pierce."

This show should make it on cast alone. Terry O'Quinn, Robert Buckley,  Rachael Taylor, Vanessa Williams, and Dave Annable so far. It's also written by one of the writers on Fringe and has Supernatural aspects to the show.

Of course I was sold on Terry O'Quinn so as long as this show is picked up it'll be on my Fall TV Schedule. 

1600 Penn (NBC)

"What happens when you're the most ordinary family in the world but your father is the president of the United States? A modern family-type of show set in the White House where all the kids are far from perfect."

A show about a dysfunction First Family. The premise kind of reminds me of Dirty Sexy Money set in the White House and I'm kind of hoping it's based on George W. Bush's family. 

I liked Bull Pullman as the president in Independence Day and he was funny in Casper (I liked it), and Brittany Snow deserves a hit show so hopefully this one will make it. Plus side is it's on NBC so even slightly average ratings should get it four seasons. 

Shelter (CW)

"Drama set at an historic New England summer resort where the new and returning staff attend to the practical, emotional and often comical needs of the guests while navigating friendships, rivalries and romances of their own."

The show has no big named actors or actresses attached to it (as far as I can find no one is attached yet) but the same could be said for One Tree Hill (minus Chad Michael Murray) and I got sucked into that show for nine seasons.  I'd give anything from Mark Schwahn a fair chance.

Fitness Update 1

So last month I started going to the Dartmouth Sportsplex. I wasn't exactly excited to start but have come to actually enjoy it. Not so much the weight lifting exercises but I get through them.

Since starting last month I have lost 4 pounds. I think it would have been more but I still have to push myself to stop eating junk. I know the occasional treat is OK but I eat more then the occasional treat so I really need to cut down the snacks. I have been able to stop eating after 9 for the most part and I'd like to knock this down to no eating after 8 soon.

I started using this bike that uses a website to track your records:

Expresso

I love it because it feeds into my competitive spirit easily by allowing me to not only try to beat my own scores but also try to beat the scores of other users in Dartmouth. I also enjoy the treadmills but I have always enjoyed them so that is nothing different. I still do not like the steppers. If I wanted to run stairs I`d go run real stairs. 

The Sportsplex also offers some great fitness classes. In the near future I want to try a spinning class and some of the aqua classes but I have tried Zumba and love it. Anyone that knows me knows I love dancing. I played the Wii version of Zumba and it was fun but frustrating because it scores your movements and sometimes I just want to move to the music. I`m the only guy that attends the class but that`s OK. It`s really fun and I wish more guys would become comfortable and try it out because it`s a good workout and you`re having fun so you don`t even notice. Here`s a video of my favorite dance I`ve done so far mostly because I really like the song. 

Starting next week I`m gonna try one of the morning aqua classes as well as Zumba at night. I haven`t used the pool there as much as I would like and I`ll have to change that in the future. 

That`s it for this month. I`ll keep it going so wish me luck.

Music Monday: Songs that stick with me

Every week artists release new songs. Some of them become instant hits while others take time to grew. You look at the charts and you see the same artists every week: Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, Justin Bieber. There music may be hits today but in a short time they will be replaced by the next big thing and in a decade they will be the guilty pleasures of this decade. Like the Backstreet Boys, Spice Girls, and NSync they'll get replaced by what comes next. 

It takes a special song to stick with a person. A song that will stay on a play list forever while newer songs get removed and sent to the bench to only be played randomly. I thought I'd post some of the songs that stick with me through the years. Some are from before I was born and for whatever reason effected me enough to become a constant in my listening habits. Others relate to memories growing up. You can't really ever explain why the song sticks with you. It's just a love for the song that can't be explained.

Everyone has songs they will always listen to. These are some of mine.

Rolling Stones - Blinded By Rainbows

Yeah you're blinded by rainbows
And faces in windows
Blinded by rainbows
Do you dream at night
Do you sleep at night
I doubt it

David Bowie - Heroes

I, I will be King
And you, you will be Queen
Though nothing will drive them away
We can be heroes just for one day
We can be us just for one day

The Beatles - Across The Universe

Sounds of laughter shades of life are ringing
Through my opened ears inciting and inviting me
Limitless undying Love which shines around me like a
million suns, and calls me on and on
Across the universe

The Monkees - Daydream Believer

Oh, I could hide 'neath the wings of the bluebird as she sings
The six o'clock alarm would never ring
But it rings and I rise wipe the sleep out of my eyes
The shavin' razor's cold, and it stings

Cheer up, sleepy Jean, oh what can it mean
To a daydream believer and a homecoming queen?

Michael Jackson - Billy Jean

Billie Jean is not my lover
She's just a girl who claims that I am the one
But the kid is not my son

 Live - Lightning Crashes

Lightning crashes, a new mother cries
This moment she's been waiting for
The angels open her eyes, pale blue colored iris
Presents the sun and puts the glory out to hide, hide

Pearl Jam - Better Man

She loved him, yeah...she don't want to leave this way
She needs him, yeah...that's why she'll be back again
Can't find a better man

Sound Garden - Black Hole Sun

Stuttering, cold and damp
Steal the warm wind tired friend
Times are gone for honest men
And sometimes far too long for snakes
In my shoes, a walking sleep
And my youth I pray to keep
Heaven send Hell away
No one sings like you anymore

Dave Matthews Band - Crash Into Me

Touch your lips just so I know
In your eyes, love, it glows so
I'm bare boned and crazy for you
When you come crash
into me, baby

Bush -  Glycerine

I couldn't change though I wanted to
Should have been easier by three
Our old friend 'Fear' and you and me
Glycerine, Glycerine